Guys, some children grow up receiving full love and validation from their parents. However, it’s undeniable that there are also kids who grow up alone, never feeling appreciated or having their emotions validated.
Actually, acknowledgment from parents is crucial for a child’s long-term development. Clinical psychologist Dr. Holly Schiff, Psy.D., says validation is an essential foundation for building self‑esteem and emotional resilience in children.
Dr. Schiff also notes that when a child is neglected, it affects how they view themselves and interact with others in adulthood.
“This also helps build healthy relationships. If a child’s feelings or needs are ignored, rejected, or dismissed, they may carry those experiences. This leads to difficulties in how they see themselves and how they interact with others as adults,” he explained.
Citing the Parade website, psychologists point out several distinct personality traits in adults who were never appreciated during childhood. What are they? Check it out!
1. Sering Meragukan Dirinya Sendiri
Ilustrasi menyendiri/Foto: Magnific.com
Parental validation helps foster a child’s self‑confidence. However, when a child lacks this, the opposite effect can occur.
Dr. Schiff says such individuals become less confident and often doubt themselves. This self‑doubt can create uncertainty and anxiety, making them feel stuck both personally and professionally.
People who frequently doubt themselves often struggle with making decisions, taking on new jobs, or stepping out of their comfort zones.
2. Perfeksionis
Children who were never appreciated by their parents during early years may develop a strong perfectionist tendency. Dr. Schiff explains that this perfectionism arises from a lack of external validation during their growth period.
Unfortunately, this perfectionist trait creates pressure, anxiety, and a high risk of burnout. Dr. Schiff says, “They may work excessively hard and avoid mistakes at all costs while feeling incompetent.”
3. Hiper-Kemandirian
Ilustrasi bekerja/Foto: Magnific.com
A further personality trait observed in adults who were never appreciated by their parents during childhood is excessive independence. This occurs because they lacked emotional support, leading them to convince themselves they never need anyone.
They view dependence on others as a weakness. Dr. Hafeez notes that such hyper‑independence can result in isolation, exhaustion, and difficulty accepting help when truly needed.
4. Suka Menyenangkan Orang Lain
Children who are not appreciated tend to seek external validation. Consequently, they become inclined to please others.
They do this to be accepted. They struggle to say “No” and tend to avoid conflict to maintain acceptance.
5. Sulit Menetapkan Batasan
Ilustrasi mengeluh/Foto: Magnific.com
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